Suicide of Briony McRoberts

To suffer from depression is to know one is cursed as it is one of the most debilitating illnesses out there. As one blighted with this curse; to the outside world I am successful, together etc. etc. Yet, most days I simply want out of this abhorrent existence. Dark thoughts pervade my every waking moment, torment and pain are my bedfellows.

Perhaps depression is the inability to love oneself and/or others. I have reasoned that 'pain/torment' can be so exacting, that suicide is a reasonable and viable option. Why would anyone want to live with continual tortured and painful thoughts. Even when one moves to a place that one's demons have been slayed; getting therapy; on maximum dose of drug therapy and yet still the thoughts remain. The awful helpless sense of despair, what then? Why would anyone want to live with that? Why would anyone want their loved ones to live with that? The individual needs to find a reason to live that is just about them.

Suicide is perhaps the last act of defiance - two fingers to the world "life if you wanted me to live, you should have treated me better". Or perhaps suicide is just wanting peace, stillness, nothingness because the pain/torment is just too much!